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Joke of the Day

"I think I just had my first orgasm? I was shaking and my legs were shaking and everything. Then I just realized that wasn't a orgasm, ""THAT WAS A EARTHQUAKE!"" :'("

"What is a group of Pedophiles called? A conclave!"

"Where is everybody? Everybody? I don't know. All over the planet I guess."

"Having friends is like having a Porsche... I'd really like to have a Porsche."

"This sub has taken a dive recently I guess I should put my phone in rice to try and dry it out."

"What's black and white and red all over? A nun falling down the stairs."

"I used to be friends with a lot of metalheads. But then, gradually, our relationships got a little bit rusty."

"I used Apple Maps to find my girlfriend's clitoris Ended up licking a doorknob."

"Netflix would be by far the best dating site. ""Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"""

"I need to polish up on my flirting skills... Hej kochanie, chcesz niektore pieprzy?"