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Joke of the Day

"Netflix would be by far the best dating site. ""Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"""

"The bartender says, ""We don't serve time travelers in here."" A time traveller walks into a bar."

"what's the difference between you and an egg? eggs get laid!"

"What's the difference between one direction and futurama There's only one bender in futurama"

"Yo mama so fat, the sorting hat placed her in the house of pancakes."

"Say what you will about human beings, but we did invent ice cream."

"What do you call a crocodile/robot sent from the future to save the past? Termigator (jesus christ this one's even worse than the last)"

"Why do sharks live in saltwater? Because pepperwater makes them sneeze."

"There should be a sequel song about needing a ride back from Funkytown."

"Tried having an argument with a Mobius Strip... ...It was pretty one-sided"