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Joke of the Day

"Never look back. If Cinderella went back to pick up her shoe, she wouldn't have become a princess."

"Saw an accident on the highway today that made me feel like a short-sighted man in a strip club... I couldn't see much but there was definitely a semi involved."

"Did you hear about the Antennas that got married? The wedding was lame, but the reception was great!"

"Which member of the Bach family went to prison? Bachgen Drwg. (it's welsh)"

"On her deathbed my wife said, ""Sweety, I will see you in Heaven."" Since then I have kicked a puppy, stole from 4 shops and set fire to an orphanage.!"

"IRS Agent: What's all this? Bracken: Well you told me to bring all my records with me and I did. Here's some by Willie Nelson Tammy Wynette and Garth Brooks . . ."

"Why was the skunk arrested for counterfeiting? Because he gave out bad scents (cents)."

"Have you heard my construction joke? I'm working on it."

"Chocolate P Women only like three things. 1. Chocolate 2. Penis 3.Chocolate Penis"

"911:What's your emergency? M:I've been shot.. 911:ok sir,keep calm now.. M:thru the heart..and you're to blame 911:Mr Jovi,this has to stop."