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Joke of the Day

"911:What's your emergency? M:I've been shot.. 911:ok sir,keep calm now.. M:thru the heart..and you're to blame 911:Mr Jovi,this has to stop."

"I wouldn't be mad. And the Lord said unto John ""Come forth and receive eternal life"". But John came fifth and won a toaster."

"Doritos - my own personal love triangles."

"Wanna know my secret to rock hard abs? I ride the mechanical duck outside the grocery store 300 times a day."

"What is a feminist's least favourite Maths topic? Trigger-nometry."

"Why did the zombie start ripping up sheet music? Because he was de-composing."

"You guys wanna hear a potassium joke? K"

"Wine doesn't have many vitamins. That's why you have to drink a lot of it."

"A baby seal walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""What will you have?"" The seals says, ""Anything but a Canadian Club."""

"This thanksgiving, Turkey is fighting back"