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Joke of the Day

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no cash, no hope and no jobs. God please don't kill Kevin Bacon."

"What do you call 2 gay Irishmen? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael"

"Doctor Doctor some days I feel like a tee-pee and other days I feel like a wig-wam. You're too tents."

"Why was the lizard's wife unsatisfied? Her hubby had a reptile dysfunction."

"Now I know it's the 100 Aniversary of the Titanic and all... But aren't the Italians going a little far with their tribute"

"A Tiger ? What do you do ? When you cum across a tiger? Zip up and run like hell!"

"Harambe walks into a bar Bartender: What can I get for you? Harambe: Just ice for Harambe. Bartender: Sorry, we're out of ice. Best I can give you is a shot."

"A naughty child was irritating all the passengers on the flight from London to New York. At last one man could stand it no longer. ""Hey kid,"" he shouted. ""Why don't you go outside and play?"""

"Don't worry if you're skydiving and your parachute doesn't open You got the rest of your lives to fix it!!!"

"What's the difference between an IRS audit and prison rape? In prison, you have a chance at getting a reach around"