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Joke of the Day

"A Limerick There once was a man from the Styx Who liked to write Limericks But he failed at the sport Because he wrote them too short"

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"[hs reunion] JANE: i'm an engineer TOM: i'm a real estate developer AMY: i'm a lawyer *everyone looks at me* ME: *panics* i'm a hospital"
"Q: How does a blonde prepare for safe sex? A: She puts on rubber based lipstick."
"My wife told me I'm fantastic at cutting up cheese I told her she's greater"
"My friend told me ""the first stage is grief"" ""Isn't it denial?"" I replied. ""No, not for me"""
"What do you call a chicken looking at a lettuce? Chicken Caesar Salad"
"Introducing my girlfriend to the family Me: This is my girlfriend Jane Jane: Hi Wife: What the fuck"
"Freak parents out on Facebook by posting, ""Just read a health article about how a camera flash causes diabetes in kids under the age of 10."""
"What's the difference between a Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Santa stops at 3 ho's"
"What kind of fun does a priest have? Nun."