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Joke of the Day

"How many introverts does it take to screw in a light bulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?"

"What do you call a starfish with a missing arm Patrick Stump"

"Wow, according to the New York Times, just kidding, I have no idea what's going on."

"Dad is the polite way of saying Motherfucker."

"Donald Trump has all the resources to be Batman. Instead, he chooses to be Donald Trump."

"Do you know the Greek version of Monopoly? It's called Monopoulos and you just borrow all the money from the bank. Everyone loses."

"Harambe walks into a bar... Bartender: What will you be having to drink? Harambe: I'll have a beer. Me: No, he'll have just ice. Bartender: Just ice? Me: Yes, justice for Harambe."

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? The porcupine has pricks on the outside Sorry but after seeing about 5 reposts today, I thought it was open season."

"What do republicans and porn stars have in common? They're both professionals at switching position on camera"

"Hey girl, I heard you like bad boys Well not to brag or anything but I'm bad at everything"