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Joke of the Day

"Hey girl, I heard you like bad boys Well not to brag or anything but I'm bad at everything"

"I bought shoes from a drug dealer I don't know what they were laced with but I have been tripping all day."

"I texted my girlfriend ""goodnight, love you"" but accidentally sent it to my boss. Now Its awkward, cause he holds my hand during meetings."

"I once shook hands with Michael J Fox He seemed pretty offended, but in my defense, the room was cold."

"What did one pee drinker say when he surprised the other pee drinker? Urine for a treat!"

"What is Donald Trump's least favorite '80s band? Foreigner"

"What do you call two mexican firefighters? Hose A and Hose B."

"Final Destination 5"" ...well someone doesn't understand the meaning of ""Final."""

"9/11 Called. They want their building back."

"I had a three way the other night.... Had a couple no shows, but I still had a good time."