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Joke of the Day

"[boy spreads his little arms] Boy: i love you this much daddy! Neil deGrasse Tyson: on a universal scale, that is an alarmingly small amount"

"No time to explain, I need 300 copies of this cat! *throws cat at Kinko's employee"

"Why don't black people pay rent? Because jail is free."

"You're like school in July... No class"

"HR: Me: HR: Me: HR:..87. Karen has lost 87 PERCENT VISION.. Me: HR: Me:..she looked at my cheese stick.. HR: Me: HR: Me: *eats cheese stick*"

"I've got a joke. The U.S. election system."

"Why is Reddit called Reddit? Because you've already read it!"

"My family tried an ""Unplugged Evening"", and that's how we accidentally killed Nana"

"Did you hear about the farmer's boy who hated the country ? He went to the big city and got a job as a shoeshine boy and so the farmer made hay while the sun shone !"

"Apparently a dog whistle in inaudible to the human ear. Just think, my pet could be sitting in front of me whistling a tune and I can't hear a thing."