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Joke of the Day

"HR: Me: HR: Me: HR:..87. Karen has lost 87 PERCENT VISION.. Me: HR: Me:..she looked at my cheese stick.. HR: Me: HR: Me: *eats cheese stick*"

"The entire plot of spiderman A teenage boy finds out he can shoot white stuff out his body"

"Why did Jeffrey Dahmer fuck his corpses? He already had a skin lamp, but he didn't have a flesh light"

"How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. Gas chambers don't have light bulbs."

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I wouldn't pay $200 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth."

"I love my toilet. We've been through a lot of shit together."

"Did ya hear about the new pirate movie? It's rated RRRR!"

"Why do they ask you if you want paper or plastic at the supermarket? Because baggers can't be choosers."

"A scottish man walks out of a bar..."

"The golf joke What's the best part about golf? It's the only activity where you actually aim for the hole under 18 and you don't go to jail."