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Joke of the Day

"What did the one wall say to the other wall? ""Meet you at the corner"""

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"What's the best remedy for a sex starved drug addict? A jack and coke."
"Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock? So he could wake up inside."
"Blood is thicker than water. Then again, so is oatmeal, and I would much rather be oatmeal brothers."
"Daughter: dad Im a lesbian Dad: Okay its cool 2nd daughter: dad I'm a lesbian too Dad: Does ANYone in this family like guys? Son: I do"
"Cop: license and registration. Me: I don't carry my drivers license so I don't lose it. Cop: where is it? Me: I have absolutely no idea."
"Why do gingers always complain about uncomfortable shoes? Because they have no inner-soles"
"What does a rotting corpse say? idk"
"I'm gonna hire a person to speak at my funeral and say a bunch of crazy stuff about me so my friends and family think I had a secret life."
"My daughter knows what a meth lab is thanks to an episode of The Simpsons. At least that's what I had to tell child services just now."