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Joke of the Day

"I asked my band teacher to raise my F He gave me an FF instead."

"What would you call an EDM producer on a flagpole? Datsik but not dat well."

"I remember 2016... Just like it was yesterday."

"I got a $400 ticket for playing pokemon GO in the car today. Most expensive in-app purchases EVER."

"If abortion is murder... wearing a condom must be kidnapping."

"I was tired of not finding a seat in rush-hour commutes... Which is why, I started passing stool on the train."

"How to tell if you're girlfriend is TOO fat. When she sits on your face and you can't hear your stereo any more."

"Whats the difference between a Jew and a boy scout Boy scouts come home from camp"

"Why did the thief killed himself after getting caught stealing instruments from an orchestra? He didn't have a safe Hayden place, and couldn't Handel the thought of being sent Bach to prison."

"Teacher told me to give her eye contact when I speak with her. So i jabbed my finger in her eye to touch it."