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Joke of the Day

"I used to be addicted to soap... but now I'm clean."

"NSFW I Had Sex With My Teacher Re-Dux I'm self-taught."

"Why did the man tell his mom to get him out of prison? She had gotten him out of a tight spot before."

"My favorite thing to do with 4 midget hookers ...is have a threesome."

"Why isn't Barney the Dinosaur allowed to drive? Because everybody knows -- tyrannosaurus wrecks."

"I've been in this air conditioner duct long enough to have forgotten if I'm the good guy or the bad guy in this building."

"My girlfriend got sacked from work and then lost her appeal. I only found her appealing because she had a well paid job."

"[vet school] ME: Welcome, students. Hope you brought textbooks because- [spins cat on finger like basketball] -I have no idea what I'm doing"

"What idiot named them nostrils instead of scent vents?!"

"Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No, neither have they."