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Joke of the Day

"When I'm having a bad day, I like to think of Prince William, Prince and will.i.am introducing themselves to each other."

"why do feminists have two more brain cells than a cow? so when you play with their tits they don't shit on the floor."

"What's the difference between Twitter and Game of Thrones? Twitter only allows 140 characters."

"How do you know your gf is getting fat? She starts fitting in your wife's clothes..."

"Before my girlfriend moved in I always had one night stand Now that things are getting serious we have two night stands"

"Noah's ark. A side story. An elephant asks a dinosaur: -Did Noah send you a friend request on facebook? -No ............. -That's bad..."

"When my doctor told me that I am able to astral project at night... ... I was beside myself"

"I get worried when someone posts a kitten pic with a foreign language, I don't know if they're showing a cute kitty pet or their dinner."

"I didn't know you could get paid for donating sperm. When I think of all the money I've let slip through my fingers..."

"Ha! Major typo on page 28 of the new iTunes agreement. Anyone else catch that?"