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Joke of the Day

"She told me to give her nine inches and to make it hurt... So i fucked her three times and punched her in the gut."

"What is black and doesn't work? Decaf coffee."

"What do prayers and my Reddit submissions have in common? No one fucking reads them."

"Why couldn't the taxidermist finish anything he started? Because he kept getting side tracked by pet projects"

"My baby's sick. We used rectal thermometer on him & he didn't even mind. Looks like we might have a little choreographer on our hands."

"WHAT DO YOU CALL...... Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL IT WHEN SOMEONE FARTS IN A GAY BAR? A: A PICK UP LINE"

"When a blonde goes to London on a plane how can you steal her window seat ? Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row"

"Why did the leper crash his car? He left his foot on the accelerator."

"What's the last thing to go through a fly's mind when it hits your windshield? it's butt."

"Why cant obama ever be on a dollar bill? they would have to use to much ink."