31980

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg in a terrible car accident? He's all right now."

"What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? One requires tweetment and the other needs oinkment"

"Rap videos are completely unrealistic. Nobody has that many friends"

"You laugh because you think it's a joke. I laugh because you think I'm joking."

"Saw a man at the beach yelling ""HELP! SHARK! HELP!!!"" I just laughed, I knew that shark wasn't going to help him."

"And now a mediocre blonde joke: what do you call a blonde who dyes her hair Artificial intelligence"

"Why cant a bicykle stand on its own? Because its two tired! *badum tiss*"

"Why do melons have to get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe."

"What does a ninja use to measure someone's pulse A **stealthoscope**"

"Hi. My name is Bill Gates and today, I will be teaching you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10"