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Joke of the Day
"The U.S. will soon have the first first lady that was not born in the U.S. Vladimir Putin"
Next Joke
"Rob somebody at gunpoint today, show the world how serious you are at nicknaming your new friend Robert."
"Have you ever heard the one about the dust bunny and the mud pie? Well then sorry, I only tell clean jokes."
"New children's book I'm working on: ""Nobody poops but you, you disgusting little freak""."
"Didja hear that Israel's Chief Rabbi has told Israeli LGBT's that they will no longer be allowed to speak Hebrew ... wait for it ... Yeah - they're gonna have to speak Shebru instead ..."
"I went to get lyposuction the other day. It really takes a lot out of you. (Thought of this one in the shower :D)"
"Never trust a ""Bernie"" to manage your finances... The last one I knew Madoff with all my money."
"Tuna comments What do tuna fish say pussy tastes like?"
"Use chemicals to remove polish and no one bats an eye, Use chemicals to remove the Polish and you're literally Hitler."
"it's never okay to hit a woman ! wipe her make up and fight her man to man"