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Joke of the Day

"I have two kids, five and seven Silly names I know."

"I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister."

"I did so much yard work today, I might get deported."

"How much for the giant, walk-in medicine cabinet? ""Sir, this is a liquor store."""

"What is the difference between a Ferrari and a boner? I don't have a Ferrari."

"If you watch Jurassic Park backwards, it's an uplifting film about dinosaurs and people who work together to rebuild an island."

"Chuck Norris doesn't count his chicken before they hatch. He cracks them and eats them."

"Why can't Jesus eat a cheeseburger? Because he's dead."

"*looks gift horse in the mouth Gift Horse: Hey, my eyes are up here."

"Maybe the baby wasn't on board. Maybe the baby was against the whole thing."