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Joke of the Day

"*leaves one gummy bear in the packet* i'm letting you live so you can go back to your king and tell him to send the rest of his troops"

"What goes eek eek bang? A mouse in a minefield !"

"A teacher walks up to a Mexican criminal... A teacher walks up to a Mexican criminal and asks him to turn in his essay. The Mexican criminal says ""Me no snitch."""

"How does Justin Beiber remove a condom? He farts."

"The NSA: The only part of government that actually listens"

"What do you call a Vietcong that's been hit by napalm? Charlie Brown"

"Why do women aged 40+ not play hide and seek? 'cause nobody would be looking for them."

"The lottery gives you about a 1 in 200 million chance you won't be going to work tomorrow. Alcohol will give you a 1 in 5. #PowerballFever"

"My homie only lets dudes use his lawnmower. No hoe mow."

"What do you call a Starving German Woman Faminenazi"