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Joke of the Day

"So I walked into a pub with some of the lads... Oh wait hang on I don't have a social life."

"One time I threw my cat at a spider so I could escape, but sure I'd love to hold your baby"

"Who is the biggest slut in America? Little Debbie, everybody eats her."

"What is the easiest way to know if a rabbit is homosexual? His carrot smells like shit"

"Men don't ignore us; they have selective hearing. Give them instructions for roasted turkey & they'll remember ""breast, thighs, moist & hot"""

"Little girl: ""Mommy, I want to be a feminist when I grow up."" Mom: ""Well pick one sweetie, you can't do both."""

"hello poison control. i need some poison asap, my kid is being a real piece of shit. yes i'll hold."

"Of course, Lil' Wayne isn't his real name. It's Lillian Waynard."

"Why was the little boy unhappy? Because he had a frog stapled to his face"

"I just hired a private investigator to find out what I do all day."