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Joke of the Day

"How do you tell a male chromosome from a female chromosome? You pull down its genes!"

"Did you hear about the Wall Street bankers that won the Nobel Peace Prize in Chemistry? They turned the economy into shit."

"I just found out a distant relative of mine has eaten three people. It's a lot to digest"

"Facebook is in a relationship with the stock market and it's complicated."

"Why do teenage girls always hang out in odd numbers? Because they can't even."

"The doctor asked if I was sexual active. I shook my head and said ""Not in front of the wife""."

"What do I think about my toes? They couldn't be further from my mind."

"Q: How does Hitler tie his shoes? A: With little Nazis."

"I met Mrs. Right today Too bad she's already married."

"It creeps me out when my dog watches my wife and I have sex. We hide the videotapes, but he always finds them."