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Joke of the Day

"I'm not saying don't trust the internet, but there's an alarming discrepancy in the number of Ipads I've won & the number of Ipads I own."

"A hangover so good you crawl out of the bedroom naked and sleep for 6 more hours on the kitchen floor."

"What do reindeer have that other animals don't have? Baby reindeer"

"What do you call introverted hobbits? Shyer folk"

"I stopped using Hotmail, it's not for me. I'd rather have an average mail with a pleasant sense of humor and a fulfilling career."

"What's yellow and lives off dead beetles? Yoko Ono. --------------- The Beatles have reformed and have brought out a new album. It's mostly drum and bass."

"When a girl tells you she has a nipple piercing, the correct response is always ""I don't believe you."""

"Caveman1: look, I invent wheel Caveman2: what we do now? Caveman1: wait for Jesus to take wheel Caveman2: dum dum Jesus not invented yet"

"What happened when The Pope went to Mount Olive? Popeye kicked his ass!"

"Why don't oysters like to share? Because they're shellfish."