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Joke of the Day

"How can you teach your child about adversity if you don't leave a diaper unchanged once in a while?"

"Sometimes when I cum, I scream really loudly because people should knock before opening a bathroom stall."

"Still waiting for #WTF! Friday where we all list people whose popularity is a mystery to us."

"*adds lol to the end of a message to sound less mean*"

"I would dress like Batman more often, but I cant run the risk of giant aliens invading and mistaking me for a large Pez dispenser."

"2 Mexicans and a white man are in a car, who's driving? The police officer"

"The reason I like Twitter is because the ladies on here LIKE being followed. Unlike like little miss restraining order down the street."

"[walks up to guys playing basketball] ""mind if I join?"" you any good? Hell yeah I'm good. Toss me the orange sphere"

"SHENG WANG: FUN AT THE PARK Ordinarily, staring is creepy. But if you spread your attention across many individuals, then it's just people watching."

"I thought I was having a pretty productive day until I realized my phone is set to west coast time and I'm in NJ"