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Joke of the Day
"2 Mexicans and a white man are in a car, who's driving? The police officer"
Next Joke
"Daughter asked me, ""Dad, who is your favorite Queen?"" I said, ""Friddie Mercury"" And another one bites the dust."
"""President Clinton, can you respond to rumors of renewed infidelity?"" The only woman in my life is my darling *squints at notecard* Hitlery"
"What do you call a cat crossed with a canary? a cosh(x/a)"
"I told facebook my concerns about lack of privacy; they said they already knew how I felt about it."
"If John Lennon made a rap song today It would go... I'm in love with the Yoko! Them other Beatles thinking oh no! Now they wanna go solo! But no one give a fuck about Ringo!"
"Stars! They're just like us! Gaseous and dying"
"me (on desert island): good thing i was able to grab this CD player & my 5 fav CDs other survivor: I saw you put down bread & pick those up"
"Been rubbing this thing on my carpet for 2 hours and still nothing. How the hell do you recharge a smart car?"
"What did Dracula say to the teacher? See you next period."