26890

Joke of the Day

"Kids today will never know the joy of being selected to go outside to dust the erasers."

"What happens when your favorite team wins the World Cup? You turn off your playstation."

"My wife didn't believe me when I told her I'd built a car out of spaghetti, penne and tortellini... ......You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta."

"What do you call a female roach with a weiner? A transpestite."

"Maths and Girls are the most complicated things, but Maths at least has some logic."

"Me: Got a hot date this weekend? Coworker: Ummm...no. Me: I know. I was just reminding you. Coworker...."

"Spell roast five times, r-o-a-s-t, r-o-a-s-t, r-o-a-s-t, r-o-a-s-t, r-o-a-s-t. What do you put in a toaster? I usually put bread in a toaster."

"My girlfriend said she was cutting off sex for a while. I told her that is fine, we will just have more rape."

"What keyboard shortcut is extensively used by journalists who work for Breitbart News? alt right"

"My car lease is up and I have to return it back to the dealer today, so I'm practicing jumping out of a moving car."