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Joke of the Day

"Peter Pan escaped the adult world... ...by becoming an alcoholic. He goes by Peter the Panhandler now."

Next Joke
 
"What does Father Christmas call his money ? Iced lolly ?"
"My niece told me this joke and I thought it was great! Knock knock! -Who's there? -The interrupting Cow -The interr..... -MOOOOO!"
"At any given moment the urge to sing is just a whim away. A whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away..."
"Whats worse than Bad command or File name? Windows update message asking you to restart your computer"
"Ego and Super Ego walk into a bar. Bartender says, ""I'm going to need to see some Id."""
"4 said he went potty and I asked if it was number one or number two. He said number 7, and now I'm terrified to go into the bathroom."
"FOUND: 17 AGGRESSIVE DISEASED RATS LIVING IN LOCAL DUMPSTER. PLEASE CONTACT IF YOUR 17 AGGRESSIVE DISEASED PET RATS ARE MISSING."
"Me: I can't seem to lose weight CW: Have you tried cutting back on your sugar intake Me:*stirring coffee with snickers bar* What do you mean"
"So, I got a card from a friend that said ""I'm Sorry"". It was all handcrafted and I didn't know what it was for, but I was flattered. I opened it and it said ""For fucking your mom"" :0 WTF!?!?!?"