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Joke of the Day

"My heart goes out to the teenage girls in California who, due to the drought, can no longer take ""unusually long"" baths like we did"

"Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"

"What is Tiger Woods favorite course? The intercourse."

"My asian friend lent me a cow with hair that changes color It's currently on roan"

"I want to create something so good that everyone hates it a week later."

"If Einstein were alive, he would listen to 10 minutes of scientific breakthroughs before asking you to describe free online porn again."

"Some are mad Trump won. Others are mad that the anti-Trumps are mad. I'm mad that you open up a new bag of chips and it's only 1/3 full."

"Why is milk so fast? Because it's pasteurized before you see it!"

"Why does Calvin Harris like reading fairy tales? He loves a good happy ending"

"I have a cut on my leg Doc ""Yeah that legs gotta go sir"" But its a tiny cut ""Sorry, I cant save it"" *sharks fake doctor outfit falls off*"