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Joke of the Day

"How long is a Chinaman?"

"TIL that 'gullible' has been removed from the latest edition of the Oxford English dictionary... Seriously. I swear."

"Bought an elephant for my friends So I bought my friends an elephant for their room. They said ""Thank you."" I said ""Don't mention it."""

"What do you call an Orangutan, a tortoise and a hamster in cars? Top Gear, ^^or ^whatever ^^their ^^new ^^amazon ^^car ^^show ^^will ^^be ^^called."

"*thumb wrapped in giant bandage* CW: Oh my God, what happened? Me: Never challenge a hitchhiker to a thumb war."

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No i-dear What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no i-dear"

"Want proof advertising works? I just bought a Goodyear blimp."

"sure the early bird may get the worm... but the second mouse gets the cheese"

"I just put my D in a subwoofer and wubbed one out"

"""you create beauty with your soul and personality! and also with not being fat and with using this make up."" - women's magazines"