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Joke of the Day

"Gay used to mean happy, then it meant homosexual, then it meant kind of lame, now it's just gay."

"A vegan, a feminist, and a Stranger Things fan walk into a bar... I only know because they told everyone within two minutes..."

"What's it called when a terrorist's wife cheats with an American? Infidel-ity."

"What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls on you? A pool table"

"Hey Tim Burton, it's okay to be out of ideas."

"You know you are Canadian when 0c and sunny is beautiful warm day..."

"Guy Fieri got into a fistfight with his hairdresser. I guess he finally looked in a mirror and saw what the dude's been doing to his hair."

"[2 Years into Cosmetology School] Me:[applying perfect contours] When are we gonna start learning about space?"

"*Takes gift wrapping paper to the counter* Her: Did you want to buy that? Me: No, I just wanted to hold it for a while."

"What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One WALKS on the MOON, and the other fucks little children."