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Joke of the Day

"I used to have a friend who practiced acupuncture."

"What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice. (Sorry for old joke)"

"Sharks don't like the taste of human flesh, which must mean they are drama queens who only eat people for attention."

"Some girl just asked me if she was wearing too much makeup. I told her it depends on whether she's going to kill batman or not."

"When you walk into a barn You step on some shit. Dammit Bojack."

"In regards to Caitlyn Jenner's car accident I guess you could call it vehicular translaughter."

"What happens when your friend from Prague topples over? You right a Czech."

"How do you make five pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it."

"Did you know that Hitler invested in Minute Maid before he died? He heard they were 100% concentrated juice."

"If Apple made cars... ...would they have Windows installed?"