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Joke of the Day

"Sorry I said you looked like black Garfield in your Catwoman costume."

"If there was a mathematical equation to describe social justice warriors... It would be a really nice log. An ideal log."

"I loved Prince, and in my opinion, Michael Jackson was pale in comparison."

"We see you, people who order tea at coffee shops. We see you..."

"After 2 divorces, I gave up on that 'dream girl' shit long ago. At this point, if she has no outstanding warrants, I'll talk to her..."

"How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex? Call her and tell her about it"

"Where do bees go to the bathroom at? at the [BP Station](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b8/Bp_station_zanesville_ohio.jpg) *Sorry, I know...its a Dad joke.*"

"What's Mary short for? She's got little legs, I guess."

"There are two types of people in the world... Those who can read between the lines."

"Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth? A1: You need a quarter to use the phone."