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Joke of the Day

"A girl once broke up with me... A girl once broke up with me because I quoted Linkin Park too much. It was a great releationship, but in the end it doesn't even matter."

"yo momma so fat the back of her neck is like a pack of hot dogs"

"Isn't it annoying when engineering students call themselves engineers? It's stupid. You don't hear medical students calling themselves doctors or arts students calling themselves baristas."

"4: can you whistle? M: *whistles* 4: Here's a booger. M:... 4: Keep it forever. Have kids they said. It'll be fun they said. Liars."

"I don't like telling people who have Beatlemania a joke. If they don't get it, they just won't let it be."

"Why did the irishman wear two condoms? to be sure, to be sure."

"Liverpool have went from SAS to LOLS From Suarez and Sturridge to Lallana Origi Lambert Sturridge"

"A new study has found that if a woman drinks 2 glasses of wine per day it increases the chance of a stroke... if you let her finish the bottle, she'll probably suck it too."

"Don't ask me stupid questions and I won't hurt your stupid feelings."

"I hear Louis CK is changing his name To Louis C D"