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Joke of the Day

"4: can you whistle? M: *whistles* 4: Here's a booger. M:... 4: Keep it forever. Have kids they said. It'll be fun they said. Liars."

"What's going on under there? Nobody has to know but you. - Poncho salesman"

"What do you call a group of men with flat butts? Assless Chaps"

"If it wasn't for Carpal Tunnel I wouldn't know when to stop masturbating."

"The home cooked pizza box says to cook the pizza between 14 and 16 minutes. That's 15 minutes, right? I'm not reading too much into it?"

"You look like something I'd draw with my left hand"

"STEAK AND SEX A: What does a good steak have in common with good sex? B: They're both very rare."

"I thought I was wrong once.... but I was mistaken."

"My blonde girlfriend froze In the middle of love making so I gave her an interrogative facial expression. "" oh..I saw this on youporn"" she said,"" they call it bufferring""."

"My new girlfriend says a small penis doesn't bother her... ... but I wish she wouldn't have one at all."