226832

Joke of the Day

"elephants sleep standing up you could be chillin with an elephant and at any moment they could just be like ""lmao for sure, g'night"""

"How do you keep an idiot in suspense for 24 hours? I'll tell you the answer tomorrow."

"What do you see when you drop a piano down a mineshaft? A flat miner. EDIT: spelling"

"I ran a marathon in 2011 if you add it all up probably."

"Every year we spend more on coffee than we do on educating our children how do we sleep at night?"

"I didn't like the idea of having a beard But then it grew on me"

"Ketchup bottle farts are just as funny as people farts."

"If I ever go missing,,, I hope they put my photo on bottles of OCD medication, cuz you know those people won't stop looking."

"Bikes are held up by witchcraft if u can ride a bike you are a level 1 wizard & if u can ride a unicycle you are a level 2 dork haha owned"

"Entered a competition with 10 of my best puns thinking at least one would win.... No pun in ten did. Sorry if thats been said. It's just my favorite pun and I thought I'd share it."