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Joke of the Day

"Entered a competition with 10 of my best puns thinking at least one would win.... No pun in ten did. Sorry if thats been said. It's just my favorite pun and I thought I'd share it."

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"I'm convinced that those at work who drum on every available surface incessantly killed things as a child."
"[How the rap feud started] Me: can u invite all the rappers to my b'day party? 2pac: sure, no biggie Biggie[eavesdropping]: [wipes tears]"
"What kind of bug wants to buy lawn turf? A gras shopper."
"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. Steve Martin"
"What did the dyslexic bank robber say? ""FREEZE MOTHERSTICKER! THIS IS A FUCK UP!"""
"What's a pirate's least favorite letter? **R** systems have detected a breach of copyright coming from your home address."
"It may be autocorrect, but I'm excited to see how this plays out when I drive my friend to pickup her satan wedding dress."
"To protest Donald Sterling's racist comments I'm going to continue to not care about basketball."
"My wife urged me to be more experimental in the bedroom, but I guess she wasn't expecting I'd be dissecting so many white mice."