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Joke of the Day

"A girl from Alabama asked me if I found her attractive. I said, ""You've got a face only a brother could love."""

"Count Dracula survived on the blood of 18 year old virgins for Millennia... He died last year."

"A Massachusetts man was arrested for illegally keeping over 400 birds in his home. He tried to keep it a secret, but he couldn't keep the birds from tweeting about it."

"A teenage girl found out that she was pregnant. She thought to herself ""My mom's gonna kill me"". the newly formed embryo did the same."

"Robber: If you ever want to see your family again do exactly as I say. Now hand me that bag! Me: *sets bag on fire*"

"My wife went to the West Indies for her holidays. Jamaica? No, she wanted to go."

"A man who has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings"

"What rhymes with Orange? No it doesn't."

"Why couldn't the physicists change the lightbulb? Too much work."

"Heard about the new Itailian all-weather tires? Dago through rain Dago through mud Dago through snow And when Dago flat Dago wop-wop-wop-wop..."