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Joke of the Day
"I don't like 9/11 jokes they're 2 plane"
Next Joke
"Be a firefighter they said, Rescue kittens & throw them into fire they said, Youre misinformed they said, We're calling the police they said"
"""420 blaze it faggot"" ""grandma stop"" ""snapback"" ""stop trying to be hip grandma"" ""i have hip problems yolo swag drake"""
"If you're giving me directions and you say, ""Head north,"" I'm going to think you mean toward the sky."
"I recognize that Rome wasn't built in a day but I'm not trying to build Rome, I just want to to enjoy onion rings without gaining weight."
"Welcome to Applebee's! Can I take your order or do you need a few minutes to reflect on the mistakes you made in life that led you here?"
"Woman to friend at store: We can get shrimp for people who don't eat meat! Me: don't forget the cheese for the lactose intolerant people!"
"Why are lumberjacks bad at online video games? Because their connections are so weak they are always logging out."
"I ate 15 raw oysters last night at the restaurant. I paid for it with exploding diarrhea. I think they would have preferred cash."
"How do Japanese politicians say they got their positions? With erections."