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Joke of the Day

"How many cannibals does it take to make a sandwich? Two."

"all the sexy dinosaurs went extinct during the flirtatious period"

"A lifetime of fire drills has prepared me to completely ignore the alarm during a real fire."

"Four facts about women that prove they can do miracles. 1. They can get wet without taking a shower. 2. Bleed without being hurt. 3. Producing milk without eating grass. 4. Making boneless meat hard."

"I asked God for a bike... but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"I needed a password eight characters long... ... so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs."

"So a blind man walked into a bar.. It really hurt"

"What do light and hard have in common? You can sleep with a light on."

"What's black and never works? Decaffeinated coffee you racist fuck."

"A roman centurion walks into a bar... He holds up two fingers and says: ""Five beers, please."""