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Joke of the Day

"I got banned from B&Q in Glasgow today Some cunt came up to me in an orange apron and asked me if I wanted decking. Luckily I got the first punch in."

"My mom and her church biddies have morphed Facebook's ""People you may know"" to ""People who likely cleaned your face with spit on a hanky."""

"what did the jewish child molester say? hey kid, wanna buy some candy?"

"If you ever feel like you're bad at your job, remember At least you don't work in polling"

"NSSSA -National Stutter Association."

"How can Donald Trump avoid impeachment? By dropping out now."

"Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre"

"What's the difference between Jews and Boy Scouts? Boy Scouts come back from camp."

"The door to door bible people just skipped my house! See, all it takes is trying to kiss the guy and he wont be back (until 3am)"

"It's about time we, as a sophisticated society, start getting birds to wear diapers."