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Joke of the Day

"what did the jewish child molester say? hey kid, wanna buy some candy?"

"What's the difference between plants and black men? Cells are found inside plants."

"""It doesn't say anywhere that you have to EAT them, you see,"" I explain to the Olive Garden waitress as my breadstick kingdom adds a library"

"What is reddit's favourite country M'laysia (sorry, my friends and I are drunk and we think it's funny)"

"Visiting grandma (nsfw) Mommy, mommy, I don't want to visit grandma today! ""Shut up and keep digging, boy."""

"Why couldn't the dolphin turn around in a hallway Because he was driving a tractor"

"I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce."

"I once took a ski away from an Eskimo... Then he dressed in black and got real depressed"

"Don't worry, men. Women can't tell women to calm down either."

"If simply wrinkling my nose at your smell is politer than spraying you head to foot with Febreze then so be it. Not happy but so be it."