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Joke of the Day

"What's the tallest building in the world? A library, because there are so many stories. (Did Not Make Up this Joke)"

"What did the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants say? ""Argh it's driving me nuts!"""

"Disguise a mini-recorder as a walkie-talkie and play this at high volume: ""DO YOU COPY? IT'S A BEAR WITH HUMAN HANDS! A BEAR WITH--[static]"""

"My wife told me I should spice things up in the bedroom. So I decided to cumin her mouth."

"Aches and Pains by Arthur Ritis"

"I saw a front page post today about a woman who hasn't experienced a period in 15 years. That's one long sentence."

"I used a fax machine today!! I also ran all the cotton thru the gin and plowed the field with my oxen while it finished dialing up."

"To me funny is beautiful."

"Why is everyone worried about meteors instead of the possibility that Russia just got their own Superman?"

"What do you get when you cross-breed a shark and a cow? I have no idea but I wouldn't try milking it."