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Joke of the Day

"What did the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants say? ""Argh it's driving me nuts!"""

"Ex-homeless man with ""golden voice"" announced he's running for president... Marking the first time Donald Trump has hated anything golden."

"What do you feed a disappearing cat? Evaporated milk"

"Fishing... It's like sex. The less you get the more you lie."

"First they came for the Fight Club members, but I said nothing, because...you know...rules."

"It's surprising how little people change Actually the process isn't that different, other than the tiny clothes"

"what's the difference between a Ferrari and a boner? ...I have a boner."

"If I take a bite of your food at a restaurant and your food is better than my food, just be aware that our relationship is now in danger"

"A pirate walks into a bar... He has a ship's wheel right on his crotch. The bartender asks: ""What's the wheel for?"" The pirate reply's: ""ARRRRRGH, It's drivin' me nuts!"""

"How do you tell a crazy Jew that it's all in his head? ""It's psychosemitic"""