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Joke of the Day

"Once you hit the speed of light... Once you hit the speed of light, you have infinite mass. So you know what? That's my problem: I'm not fat, I'm fast."

Next Joke
 
"What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? Cake Moss and Naomi Candles"
"How many music majors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 16 One to screw it in and 15 others to stand around and talk shit about how bad the one person did."
"I still keep my old Blackberry on me in case I get mugged and the person's like ""HAND ME YOUR PHONE!"""
"2 Scientists walk into a bar, one asks for H20 and the other asks for H20 too. The other scientist dies."
"What kind of dough do Hobbit bakers use? Frodough."
"Kim Jong Un has upgraded himself from ""Leader of North Korea"" to ""Supreme Leader of North Korea"" by adding sour cream and extra cheese."
"Always remember.... A mirror never lies. (Fatty)"
"Why do bald guys cut holes in their pockets? So they can run their fingers through their hair."
"A man clicks on a post in /r/jokes... I'm watching you."