93828

Joke of the Day

"I still keep my old Blackberry on me in case I get mugged and the person's like ""HAND ME YOUR PHONE!"""

"What is your best weed/stoner related joke? I've never heard any good ones so please give me your best!"

"So a guy walks into a bar with a gun. Angry he snarled, ""Aight, who the hell boned my wife and mom?"" The bartender shook his head and smiled, ""You don't have enough bullets bud."""

"The bartender says, ""We don't serve time travelers here."" A time traveler walks into a bar."

"I always think the same thing when I find a Zubat and when I meet a stuck-up woman... I'm not wasting my balls on that!"

"What is the difference between a cock and a penis? A cock is an animal. Penis is a male sexual organ."

"What's the most favorite bird among most men? [BOOBIES!](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Booby) I can't believe no one has made this joke here yet."

"The hardest part of being a congressman must be pretending to actually like the people where you're from."

"What tastes good? Popcorn."

"[Safari] ""Remember, when you're near water beware of wild hippos."" Don't worry, I'm prepared for that. *shows handful of white marbles*"