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Joke of the Day

"What do you call someone who is really good at fishing? A master-baiter"

"After getting off the ski lift, my mate said ""Let's go hit the slopes!"" I'm like, ""Why do you want to beat up those Japanese tourists?"""

"Who are the greatest philosophers today? The TSA. They are always asking people, ""Who are you?"", ""Where did you come from?"", ""Why are you here?"", and ""Where are you going?"""

"Trump is like a racehorse.... If it aint running, it's just an ass."

"Dark comedy is like food. Not everyone gets it."

"Joe is getting ready his Batman impression... So he decides to show his friend Bob. ""Hey Bob, wanna see a Batman impression?"" ""Okay."" ""NOT THE KRYPTONITE!"" ""That's Superman."" ""Thanks Bob!"""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Attila ! Attila who ? Attila you no lies !"

"Two days is not enough time for a weekend."

"I just saved 57 dollars on my groceries without a single coupon. Self checkouts are awesome."

"If U are nervous about public speaking, no need to picture the audience naked, just realize they will be on their phone ignoring you anyway."