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Joke of the Day

"Why don't you see any transgendered parents? Because they're trans-parent"

"My friends don't hang out with me anymore since I told them I dilute my Viagra. They just can't tolerate that I'm homeosexual"

"What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly? Viola."

"Why did Sandra fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sandra."

"I don't drink water anymore, not after what it did to the Grand Canyon"

"""911, what's your emergency?"" Hi i need to report a kidnapping. My son is taking a nap in my room right now."

"The worst kind of insomnia is snoring induced insomnia. That's when every time you start snoring your wife shoves you awake..."

"Apparently it's okay for the office to have ""casual Friday's,"" but ""nudist Tuesday's"" are frowned upon. How embarrassing for me."

"I like to steal other peoples' Viagra... It's a real dick move, I know."

"FERRET OWNERS: EITHER GET A CAT OR A SNAKE STOP TRYING TO SPLIT THE DIFFERENCE"