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Joke of the Day

"Apparently it's okay for the office to have ""casual Friday's,"" but ""nudist Tuesday's"" are frowned upon. How embarrassing for me."

"A man is in his doctors office. The doctor says ""Sir you need to stop masturbating"". ""Why"" asks the man. The doctor replies ""It's making it difficult to finish the examination""."

"Married 24 years now. All I recall about my wedding day is something about death."

"You know youre getting old when Santa starts looking younger."

"Plato walks into a bar. And he realises that the bar is not a real bar. In fact, it contains the concept of 'a bar'. Then, with an amazed face, he says: ""This bar is ideal!"""

"I like my women like I like my Little Caesar's pizza- Hot & Ready."

"What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A-flat miner"

"People in glass houses can throw whatever they want. They live in a glass house, I'm not expecting them to be practical"

"A man walks into the bar... The bartender: ""Hi Dave!"" The boss faints."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly a dick in your mouth."