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Joke of the Day
"Wedding rehearsals, because ruining your life takes practice."
Next Joke
"*mom puts a gummy vitamin in my mouth while I yawn* Mom, I'm 36. *chews it up, swallows* Adults are supposed to have 2 though."
"What do prime numbers and white girls have in common? They literally can't even."
"*painting your nails* one hand : perfect. other hand : looks like a blind cat did it."
"I got arrested for punching this guy at a new years party... When you hear an arab counting down from ten your instincts kick in."
"What idiot called it ""salad"" and not ""la sad"""
"Valve Half-life 3 confirmed"
"Of course Bruce Willis is going to keep playing the same movie roles. You know what they say about old habits....."
"How does the Ultimate Warrior repair his car? With parts unknown."
"I'm in a band called 1023 megabytes... We haven't had a gig yet"