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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to thank the spider that descended from the bill of my baseball cap for getting me motivated today."

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side"

"Does anyone else have a girlfriend great enough to tell them that they have herpes? Well, me neither"

"I used to be afraid of gardening... ...but then I decided to grow a pear."

"There are many jokes on Jimmy Fallon's TV shows... like Donald Trump and Bernie Sanders."

"How do you make a woman scream for an hour after sex? You wipe your dick with her pillow"

"What do you name a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter. He won't come."

"After some thinking i decided not to go through with the brain transplant But then, i changed my mind"

"A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gives it to him and he slams in down in one gulp. ""What do I owe ya?"" asks the neutron. ""For you? No charge."""

"Why did the dad say the joke instead of act it out? Because it was cheesier said than done."