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Joke of the Day

"An Indian news anchor was fired for referring the chinese President Xi Jinping as ""Eleven"" Jinping."

"The flight attendant keeps saying ""Please stop asking for peanuts. Busses don't have flight attendants."""

"Mexicans and blacks are pretty much the same... once you've heard juan, you've heard jammal"

"""How would you describe yourself in 3 words or less?"" Doesn't follow instructions very well."

"I used to think I was a fast reader And I was quite proud of it until I heard about these so called ""9- 11 Jumpers"" who went through over 100 stories in 10 seconds ...Incoming repost comments"

"Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia ? The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians were pulling the pins and throwing them back."

"""So your telling me that you'd be willing to lick your SO's butthole..."" ""But all be damned if you would share a toothbrush!"""

"Did you blow Bubbles when you were a child? Because I saw Bubbles today and he wanted your number."

"How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, that's a good question."

"""I'm giving a 'surprised' birthday party for you."" ""A 'surprised'. birthday party? What's that?"" ""That's where I invite a bunch of your friends and if any of them come I'll be surprised!"""